Is Ignorance Really Bliss?
Is Ignorance Really Bliss?
I used to think maybe it was. I thought that if I ignored the subtle signs my body was giving me or brushed off the patterns I kept repeating in relationships and life, things would feel easier. Life would flow, and I wouldn’t have to pay attention so closely. But here’s the thing- ignorance might feel easier in the moment, but it comes at a cost. What you ignore governs you. What you face sets you free. What you don’t notice, what you don’t feel, is exactly what keeps you from stepping into self-worth, clarity, and alignment.
The more you notice, the more your nervous system lights up. It can feel raw, exhausting, even overwhelming- but that intensity is part of the process. It’s a signal that you’re really noticing, really feeling and finally paying attention to yourself. And yet, noticing and feeling more clearly isn’t always easy. The more attuned we become, the louder life feels and the more obvious what we’ve been ignoring becomes.
The Cruel Side of Healing
This recently dawned on me- it seems like there’s this weird kind of cruel side to healing- as if the more you heal, the more you feel. I thought- Shouldn’t the fact that I’ve been intentionally healing make life easier? Why does it feel harder to handle certain parts of life than it did before? Why does it feel like I’m emotionally weaker than I used to be? Why is it that the world feels louder, and harsher and that what I used to shrug off now lands like a frying pan to the face?
When Boundaries Are Tested
I realized this during the last few recent ruptures in relationships. Something would happen that crossed a line, and I knew I needed to set a boundary. When I stated it- the other pushed back- gaslighting me, invalidating my feelings, framing themselves as the victim. Regardless of whether those actions were conscious or not, what mattered was how my body felt. It reacted like it was under attack. My thoughts were racing, my hands shook. The disconnect was intense. One part of me contemplated whether their actions were malicious, and the other part of me felt as if they were. I thought- I’ve been in this situation before. Why does this feel so much bigger than it ever was?
Awareness Amplifies Everything
That’s when it clicked, it’s bigger because I’m no longer able to ignore it. Through healing I’ve built a strong connection with my body and my emotions. I’ve stopped filling the space with noise. So, what used to slip by unnoticed is now impossible to miss. The truth is, I’m not weaker, I’m more aware. Awareness amplifies everything.
You Might Recognize This
Think about a boss who constantly undermines your ideas in front of others. Before healing, you shrug it off, tell yourself “That’s just how they are” and distract yourself after work with scrolling, vices, Netflix etc. You swallow it to keep the peace, but it plays in your mind and resentment builds. After healing, the same interaction lands differently. Your throat tightens, your body reacts, and you can’t let it go. It feels HUGE- like the final straw. You finally respect yourself, finally draw the line, you finally notice -this is the last time.
This might look different for everyone. There are many ways in which a loud nervous system shows up, depending on your personal triggers and patterns. Maybe your old coping mechanisms stop working, or maybe everyday situations -like tense conversations or the pressure of others’ expectations suddenly feel unbearable. But the result is the same- what you once brushed off now feels impossible to ignore.
Some people arrive at these realizations naturally over time through simple life maturation, but intentional inner work accelerates the process. It brings the awareness into focus sooner instead of waiting years for the “aha” moments. And while it might not sound appealing to have your nervous system light up, it’s worth it- because it anchors you deeper into self worth, clarity and alignment. The stage where everything feels big, raw and impossible to ignore-It won’t last forever.
Stages of Healing
Healing isn’t linear. There’s no finish line, but I’ve observed in my own life and in my clients’ lives that there do seem to be stages:
Early/reactive stage: Mostly coping, unaware of patterns, easily triggered, boundaries rarely exist.
Middle/experimenting stage: You start noticing patterns, testing new boundaries, sometimes slipping back.
Integration/heightened awareness stage: Your tolerance drops, your body reacts big, and you finally notice the ways you’ve been abandoning yourself. What you once accepted without thought now feels exhausting and all consuming.
Sovereignty/mature stage: Triggers still happen but you respond instead of react. You hold boundaries without the internal war. You move through life from steadiness and self-trust.
Each stage has a mini stage inside it- you ebb and flow and slide back and forth. So, if you’re feeling like the intensity of a moment is too much, it doesn’t mean you’re failing- it means you’re on the edge of a breakthrough.
Being sensitive after healing is not a defect. It’s proof you’re awake, that you’re refusing to trade your peace for peacekeeping, you’re finally listening and trusting yourself. And yeah, sometimes it feels like a frying pan to the face. But that’s what makes change unavoidable. That’s what makes growth real.
But Is Ignorance Really Bliss?
In my opinion, ignorance is only bliss in the illusion of ease. True freedom, self-respect, and alignment come when you face what you’ve been ignoring — and that, as hard as it feels, is worth it.
This reflection is just one aspect of what I teach inside the Accountability & Compassion course. It’s about holding boundaries from steadiness, noticing what your body is telling you without shutting down, and leaning into your sensitivity without it draining you. If any of this resonates, reach out — I’d love to walk alongside you.
